Watch out for that TWISTA

I have officially had my first tornado experience, and let me tell you folks, it was absolutely TERRIFYING! For those of you familiar with tornado sirens, extreme winds, and late night calls to book it to the basement, disregard the following rant session. Yet, for all my Cali readers, who are equally petrified of swirling funnels of terror, read on.



A few nights ago I was awoken at 5:30am, to The Hubby hurriedly stating "Okay Linz, we gotta go". This brief phrase, accompanied by a haunting siren, swirling winds, and pounding rain, sent my heart into a rapid explosion. Within the next few moments I was able to grab my child, and nothing else (no shoes, or bra my friends, not a pretty sight), and make a bee line to the car. My mind was completely unable to process a single thought, other than fear, as The Hub began cursing that my keys were not, in fact, in the ignition. He ran for the house, ranting that we did not have time for this, repeatedly stating that we needed to go NOW. He did not shout, but his rapid speech, and frequent curse word, made the panic rapidly rise into my throat. The only release I could muster was to breathe, and repeatedly exclaim "Oh my God".



I instantly knew that he would be unable to find anything in my Mary Poppins-esque purse, and ran in after him. I paperboy tossed our child (okay, there was no actual toss, but it sure felt that way), and plunged my hand into the depths of the diaper confusion I call a purse. After instant frustration, I dumped all the contents out, and blindedly found my keys. In a blink I was behind the wheel, throwing the car in reverse, sending gravel flying, as I sped down the driveway. The Hub was reminding me to breathe, and keep the car straight. I could barely keep my mind straight, let alone an entire car!! I could hardly see beyond the terror enveloping my vehicle, and the instant we hit the highway, The Hub urgently instructed me to "give it all its got".



One point five miles later, we were flying up to my father in laws yard, safe and sound, with a basement at our disposal. With a quick update from the weather channel, we were reassured that we were safe, and although a tornado had been spotted, we were not in immediate danger.



The calm after the storm was confusing, but tormenting all the same. Everyone laughed that I had no shoes, and all seemed to go back to normal. Yet, I still felt as though I had stared death in the eye. I had this sense that a tornado was on my tail, and by golly, I'd gotten away! What do you mean we weren't in immediate danger? Hate to break it to ya folks, but with me on the road in that state of mind, we were all in danger!



I have been told that, in time, I will get used to these 'mild' scares, and will develop a plan, and execute it calmly. I have SERIOUS doubts about my ability to stay calm in future situations, but I nod my head and pretend I won't be the crazy, bra-less freak next time.



So, Murphysboro, the next time the sirens sound, please forgive the shoeless, bra-less, lady driving like a bat out of hell, down the highway. I do not mean to be 'that lady,' but I am, nonetheless. I apologize in advance, for my severe overreaction, and any permanent damage I may cause.



We have tornadoes, and an Auntie Ems, now all we need is a dog named Toto!